Ranked a Fool, Crowned a Champion

A "Campus Simp Rankings" post went up on our college's anonymous forum, and I took the top spot. It didn't take long for someone to figure out who posted it: Casey Lowe, the prettiest girl in her department, who spent the past two years leading me on. I stood there holding the coffee I had just bought her as my roommate ran up, waving his phone. "Shane! You've done all that stuff for Casey, and now she's trashing you on the forum!" I texted Casey, but she blocked my number. Then she messaged me from a different account and had the nerve to ask me to put together a PowerPoint for her. I scoffed and typed back, [I'm busy. Ask someone else.] Chapter 1 I was on my way to Casey Lowe's dorm with a cup of coffee when I saw my roommate, Garrett Phelps, running toward me, waving his phone. "Shane!" He stopped in front of me, out of breath. "You're still buying her drinks? Have you seen the campus forum?" I blinked. "What about it?" He thrust his phone in my face. The post's title appeared in bold across the screen. [Campus Simp Rankings: Losers Who Think They're Being Romantic] I was number one. Underneath were three photos of me: waiting outside Casey's dorm with her breakfast, hauling half a dozen packages to her building, and standing outside one of her classroom buildings with an umbrella, waiting for her class to end. The top comment had over three thousand likes. [That's not devotion. That's a guy who can't take a hint.] The next one read, [Isn't he an architecture major? He's always hanging around outside her dorm holding her stuff like it's his job.] The third said, [You really think a girl that hot would go for you? Look in a mirror.] I scrolled through dozens of comments. Not one person stood up for me. "Who posted this?" Garrett lowered his voice. "Some tech guys dug around and found out it came from someone in Casey's dorm. The account's email starts with 'case,' just like her username on the student portal. They think it's her burner." I stared at those four letters, trying to make sense of it. "Come on, say something!" Garrett said. I looked down at the coffee in my hand. It was made just the way she liked. I turned to leave, but Garrett caught my arm. "Wait, there's more! Look what she just posted!" He pulled up her profile, refreshed the page, and held out his phone. Casey's latest post was a screenshot of the rankings with a caption. [I was surprised to see this post, but I want to clear something up. Shane is just a classmate. That's all he's ever been to me, and I've never led him to believe otherwise. His attention is unwanted, and at this point, it's harassment. Hopefully, he'll take the hint.] Harassment. The word hit me like a slap. Dozens of people already filled the comments, all taking her side. [Good for you, girl! You don't owe him anything!] [Finally, someone said it.] [Who even is this guy? Imagine being that desperate.] Garrett threw up his hands. "Seriously? After everything you did for her? When she got appendicitis in the middle of the night, you were the one who…" "Don't." I handed him the coffee. "Here. It's yours." "Are you okay?" Chapter 2 "I'm heading back to the dorm," I told Garrett, then turned and walked away. The room was empty. I sat down at my desk while my phone kept lighting up with messages and forwarded screenshots. I dismissed them all. Finally, I opened my chat with Casey and typed, [You there?] The message wouldn't go through. She blocked me around the time she posted about my "harassment." I stared at the unsent message for a long time. Then, I put my phone down and opened my desk drawer. Inside was the hospital payment form with Casey's name on it and my shaky signature at the bottom. That night, I carried her on my back for over a mile to the hospital. I fell along the way and scraped my right palm on the asphalt, and my hand still shook when I signed. My phone lit up again. This time, it was my academic advisor, Julia Lynch. [Shane, come to my office tomorrow at ten.] The next morning, I barely made it through Julia's office door before she slapped a printout of the forum post onto her desk. "Shane, you're one of our strongest applicants for the graduate program. You've always had a good head on your shoulders. What's going on?" I stared at the paper. The words "Campus Simp Rankings" stood out in bold. "Casey came in yesterday, sobbing." She slid a cup of water toward me. "She said you've been bothering her for almost two years, waiting outside her dorm with gifts and sending her messages every day. "Now the whole campus is talking about it. Her parents just called. They want to file a harassment complaint unless you apologize publicly." Julia's voice softened. "I know feelings can get the better of you at your age, but if this turns into a disciplinary matter, it could cost you your spot in the graduate program. Why don't you apologize and let things settle down?" I opened my mouth to explain, but her desk phone rang. She waved me out. "Think it over. I need an answer tomorrow. Don't put your future at risk." I walked out of the building, clutching the crumpled payment form in my pocket. Then my phone buzzed twice. It was a friend request. The profile picture was the same bouquet of white flowers Casey always used. She was adding me back. As soon as I accepted, she sent over a ZIP file without even saying hello. [Put together my slides for next week's statewide competition. Make them as good as the ones you did for my class project last time. [I need them in three days. Stay up late if you have to. Don't screw this up.] She acted like she had nothing to do with the post that made me a punch line for thousands of people. I stared at the screen for a few seconds, then replied, [I'm busy. Ask someone else.] Her reply came instantly. [What's your problem, Shane? It's just a PowerPoint. [You used to jump at the chance to help me. Now I have to beg? [Is this about that post? I haven't even gotten on your case about all the trouble you've caused me, and now you're throwing a tantrum? [Grow up and act like a man.] I read her messages and almost laughed. I spent three nights in a row revising the class project that won her a state award. She never mentioned my name when she accepted it. I carried her over a mile to the hospital and paid her bill. She never even offered to pay me back. And now, she claimed I was making her beg. I typed one last message. [We barely know each other. Don't contact me again.] Chapter 3 I blocked Casey and deleted her contact. My phone barely made it into my pocket before Garrett called. "Shane! Check the class group chat! Casey's going off about you!" I opened the chat and saw over 100 unread messages. At the top was a long post from Casey, complete with a crying face. [Am I being unreasonable here? I tried to let Shane down gently because I didn't want to embarrass him. Now that he realizes he can't harass me into dating him, he's refusing to finish my competition slides. [My presentation is next week. I've spent six months getting ready for this competition, and now he's trying to ruin my future. Can someone please help me?] The replies poured in. [Seriously, Shane? She won't date you, so you're getting back at her?] [I thought he just had a huge crush on her. I didn't realize he was this nasty.] [No wonder Casey said he was harassing her. Guys like that are scary.] Several of Casey's friends tagged me and demanded an apology. Then Garrett sent me a private message. [Want me to call her out? I'll post the proof right now.] I watched the insults scroll past, rubbing the crumpled payment form between my fingers in my pocket. I replied, [No need. I've got a better place to post it.] I opened the folder on my phone with the hospital payment form and money transfer records. Every photo Garrett took of Casey with her boyfriend, Kevin Zimmerman, was in there as well, all sorted by date. I started a new post on the campus forum. I only got one letter into the title before my phone buzzed again. Kevin sent me a friend request with a message attached. [Apologize to Casey, and I'll give you 1,000 to settle this. Otherwise, I'll make sure you can't show your face on campus again.] My finger hovered over the screen for a moment before I accepted his request. Kevin messaged me immediately. A separate Venmo notification showed a payment of 1,000 dollars from him. [There's your money. Apologize to Casey, delete whatever crap you're about to post, and finish her slides tonight. Do that, and maybe I'll let this go.] Before I could reply, another message popped up. [Your dad lays bricks at one of my family's construction sites, right? Keep this up, and I'll get him fired tomorrow. How's your family gonna eat?] I stared at the two messages, then sent him a screenshot of my itemized expenses. [Over the past two years, I spent 6,540 dollars on Casey, including money I sent her, gifts, and medical bills. [She wants twelve slides. At 60 dollars a slide, that's another 720, bringing the total to 7,260 dollars. Send the rest, and I'll consider the job. [You can forget about an apology.] He went quiet for two minutes. Then a string of voice messages came through. I played the first one, and Kevin's voice blared from the speaker. "Are you that desperate for cash, Shane? You think you can shake me down? Alright. You've got some nerve. Just wait. I was about to block him when Julia called. "Shane, what were you thinking?" Her voice was cold. "Casey's parents went straight to the dean of students with medical records showing she has severe depression. "They say your harassment caused her breakdown. The dean called an emergency meeting with your class this afternoon. You'll be formally reprimanded in front of everyone, and you'll lose your place in the graduate program." Chapter 4 Julia paused. "Unless you apologize to Casey and finish her slides, there's nothing anyone can do for you." I hung up and headed to the classroom for the meeting. I heard the commotion before I reached the door. It wasn't just our class. Students from all over the department crowded the hallway, and someone was livestreaming on their phone. I caught a glimpse of the comments scrolling up the screen, every one of them tearing into me. I pushed open the door. The room fell silent for a beat, then erupted in boos and insults. Casey stood at the front with swollen eyes, clutching a crumpled medical report. The second she saw me, tears rolled down her cheeks. "Shane, what did I ever do to you?" she sobbed. "Why are you trying to ruin my life? "You won't finish my slides because I won't date you? And now, you're trying to get me kicked out of school?" Her whole body shook as she cried. In the front row, Kevin leaned back with his legs crossed and his phone in one hand. He grinned at me and drew a finger across his throat. Julia stood beside the lectern with a disciplinary notice, already signed and approved. The space for my name was still blank. "Shane!" She slammed her hand on the desk. "Apologize to Casey right now, or this goes on your disciplinary record. Do you have any idea what that could do to your future?" The crowd chimed in. A few students pushed their way over and grabbed my arms. "Just apologize, Shane! Think about grad school!" "It's a PowerPoint. Would it kill you to do it?" "Come on, man. You're too old to be this petty. She's already dealing with depression. Give her a break!" Everyone shouted over one another. Julia picked up her pen and poised it over the blank space for my name. I stood a few feet from Casey at the front of the room. Her shoulders still shook, and she held a tissue over her face, but she peeked at me through a gap between her fingers. Her eyes were completely dry. Kevin stepped up beside her. He waved his phone at me and mouthed two words. "You're done." Julia touched her pen to the paper. Just then, someone kicked the classroom door open with a bang. Harold Mackenzie, the head of academic affairs, rushed in, winded, with two competition officials on his heels. They made a beeline for me. Harold handed me a certificate in front of the whole room. Across its gold-trimmed cover, WORLD CHAMPION stood out in bold red letters. "Shane! There you are!" He paused to catch his breath, then spoke loud enough for everyone in the hallway to hear. "We've got your world championship certificate!" The room fell silent. The boos and insults stopped. One of the officials stepped forward with a letter in his hand and an event badge clipped to his jacket. "We also have a letter from the organizers of the state programming competition. You've been named lead judge for the project presentations. "Casey's entry was disqualified during the preliminary review. We have reason to believe she submitted the open-source code you published as her own work."